Cheam 2's Keep Building

Apologies for the lateness of this match report, and the change in author. I’m no Big Time (Charlie Ede) but I’ll do my best.
Cheam turned up in Chertsey with two questions on their mind:

1) Where was Charlie Ede; and
2) Why were we playing away when fortress Nonsuch was free?

It’s not clear if these thoughts explain the utter shambles of the first half, but Cheam got off to a slow start going 1-0 down in the first 5 minutes (the defensive unit giving Frosty no protection). After that Cheam wandered round the pitch aimlessly following a Chertsey team who passed well and obligingly giving the ball straight back to the oppo when we turned it over. Oh and Nick Young made a meal of a short corner with a couple of expert air shots. All in all, not ideal.

Half time came, and Coops asked his favourite question “alright fellas, what’s happening?” The general consensus was that we weren’t very good. Coops gave a vintage “we’re better than this” team talk and suggested we might like to pass to each other. There was a slight air of desperation in his delivery; having recently been disowned by his family (France is a long way to go, even for a 70th birthday) Coops needed a result.

Frequent players for the 2s won’t believe what happened next, but Cheam listened to the team talk. From the off, the ball was passed around freely, and this half the Chertsey players were getting the run around. On the attack Madders, as the central linchpin, picked passes with trademark coolness and precision. Sohail made some excellent passes down the line and got the ball moving round the backline. Lawrence Marsh was making Muirwood-esque runs up front and pulling the defence apart leaving space for Fred the Shed, Jimmy and Shep to run into the D to unleash some testing shots on goal. Badger only screamed to himself once. In fact, the offensive hockey was so good it was, slightly worryingly, described as “great fluid” hockey.
Having finally decided to play, the midfield and forwards got their reward with a string of shorts, the first expertly put away by Dan on the right post (pretty sure he roofed it) to make it 1-1. A second short went the direct route via a (scuffed) shot from Nick to make it 2-1. Madders claimed the assists.

Reeling, Chertsey tried to fight back, but by this point Cheam had got into their stride. Tim Harrison found his rhythm at left back and made some excellent interceptions. Badger and Dan tirelessly harassed their midfield, Shep kept picking up loose balls from their 16s and Coops and Sohail got stuck into their forwards. Not much made it through to Frosty, but when it did it got tidied up with no nonsense.

Cheam carried on like this for the rest of the half, and with Chertsey tiring, Jimmy weaved his way through the defence in the final 2 minutes, calmly slotting the final goal past the keeper wrapping up the game (who says he’s the second best Gault?).