Newcomer to the team this year, and the first player to ask whether he could pay his match fees via contactless card payment.

Already famous for having bags of pace, a strong tackle, but a lack of 'skillz' and an unerring ability to melt when in the opposition D. Also turns up to games in his dad's kit, which he hopes to one day grow into.

Impersonates Ron Weasley at weekends, and for an extra £20, can do a decent Ginny, according to the online reviews.

Most likely to: celebrate a good win by marking some homework.

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derry brophy

Chris Blackmore

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